I think today is the end of these Athletics hats. I’m getting quite sick of not being able to put killr titles in this post just cause I am a man of my word. Today has been dubbed “Fail Friday” by my lame co-worker. Basically because I think every day is a fail day for him, but today was the only day that contained some form of alliteration. He claims it is because the majority of our support today has involved some kind of fail, I claim it is because he fails.

Well it’s been fun being completely unoriginal. It’s a shame that this repetition hasn’t translated into massive weight loss. I find it hard to believe that I did not lose/gain any weight in a week! Nothing! I don’t get that. Maybe my skinny friend was right when I asked her the following question-
Me: “hey friend, just a quick Q…”
Skinny Friend: “sure”
Me: “Laxative-friend or foe?”
Skinny Friend: ” Friend.”
Me:” for realz?”
Skinny Friend: “Laxative to the Maxative.”

When I say enchilada you say HEYYY.
Enchilada!  (HEYYY)
Enchilada!  (HEYYY)
Enchilada!  (HEYYY)

Today I said to my lame co-worker…if they have enchilada’s for lunch at the deli today, it’s my shout. Seriously what are the chances? Like 1 in 50. Why can’t I be as lucky in love as I as with enchiladas. Anyone out there see themselves as a human enchilada, if so, plz drop me a line, I’m so lonely.

I’m sitting here listening to Jay-Z thinking that I need to strive to be an East-Coast rapper/media mogul/entrepreneur. Dreaming too large? I’ll let you decided.
It’s a hat for matt, and it’s totally whack
Some say it’s lame, but you know it’s off the chain
I’m laying low and just feeling the flow
Laying the blog like it’s 2 double Oh.

Tonight I am going to weigh things up. People would probably recommend to me that I weigh up more than just my weight.  But what do you know, just cause you have a successful career, wife, a house, a car (or atleast a mode of transport that isn’t broken down), can type more than 50 wpm and know all the words to Umbrella. Sometimes I think that maybe I should strive for 1 or 2 of those things on your list, like today, today I am thinking that. But right now I am also thinking I might have gelati for dinner,  so suck on that Mr. Successful.

I went storm-chasing tonight, or as I’m sure it will be coined tomorrow “republican-chasing”. We were hit with some pretty rad lightning, forks, sporks and all sorts of cutlery related descriptions. We actually got in front of the storm, but unfortunately it headed north and the roads we were on weren’t exactly  ‘as the storm flies’. All was not lost though, as Seacrest and his AT40 was on and we got to  “throw our hands in the ayer , ay , ayer , ayer , ay , ayer. Seriously, wth?!

Today I felt cheated on so many levels. My football team lost in the last seconds of the game, these $15 headphones I just bought feel like $11 headphones and I was lied to by a shopping centre. Yeah, an entire shopping centre. They are installing a new JB Hi-Fi and they have signage for it! SIGNAGE!! Signs indicate the existance of something, surely! I mean if I put up a massive lit up JB Hi-Fi sign at the corner of my street and then another one on my front lawn, I GUARANTEE that someone would come and expect a JB Hi-Fi store of some kind. It’s common sense people, simple common sense.

After yesterday’s revelation involving my lame co-worker and his rediculous ways, he blows today apart by saying that he hates corn!!!!1!1!1!!11! CORN!! I am starting think that I never knew him at all. What kind of sick doesn’t like corn? It really makes me wonder why he turns off his monitor any time I come near him and what he does with all those maps that he brings into work….

How early is too early for confectionery? My lame co-worker just knocked back Jolly Ranchers because 10:15 was too early for ’sweets’ (his word, not mine). Jolly Ranchers people!!!!!!!!! JOLLY RANCHERS. I wouldn’t say no to a Jolly Rancher even if were 5 am and I was still asleep.  It’s just not something you do. Makes me so angry. I feel sorry for Harold today, he sure is going to cop a beating- and it’s all your fault, lame co-worker.

Today begins my tribute to 4 things- Athletics, exercise, rehearsal and repetition. The next week-ish will feature Athletics hats as an inspiration to be more athletic and lose the 10kgs by Christmas. The rehearsal and repitition will be required in order to achieve these results. The repetition also comes in the form of the same hat aswell as lyrics from the same song “Rehearsal” which has the chorus of “Darling, you are so unoriginal, each move more obvious than the one before it”.  It’s a depressing song, about as depressing as my downward spiral into depression. Exercise ftw.